The Sexuality Deception, Balancing Hormones and the Head

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating dilemma and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to obtain love, and males utilize love to obtain sex." This is a great summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is similar to the Love Trap, where songs interpret excellent sex as love. Those who fall into the Sex Trap go even further due to the fact that for these songs, having sex carries enormous meaning and effects.

Songs fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of 2 methods:

A.they believe sex is a necessary test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will ready as well).

B.more typically, all awareness goes out the window, and one or both formerly level-headed songs consider themselves a dedicated couple as quickly as they make love.
Rather than looking at whether this other individual may be a match on levels other than physical attraction-- such as long-term requirements, needs, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to stay connected with truth when all those hormonal agents are cutting loose. Our body reacts to somebody we are brought in to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone i loved this ( boosts sexual desire), that makes the chance to make love with someone we are attracted to extremely tough to resist. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce feelings), that makes us feel really near and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical reactions are uncontrolled and strong , leading to effective feelings of attraction, enjoyment, love, well-being, and nearness .

When issues arise, those who fall into the Sex Trap frequently rationalize by believing, "Well, we've got issues, however the sex is excellent!" They probably wouldn't confess it, however they prioritize physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. Their main hunting tools are sexual attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mainly with gay males, says that a lot of his customers have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay males particularly in urban locations, sex is easily available, and that in itself is a trap," North says. Why waste your time if the sex isn't going to be great?".

North includes, "I suspect this is a ' person' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do want to mention that chemistry is very important. Yet, chemistry is a provided that we cannot control in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we cannot "make" chemistry occur, though sometimes it can grow over time.

When the hormone-induced intoxication uses off and reality hits, Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry danger relationship failure.

To avoid the Sex Trap, you need to balance your heart (and hormonal agents) with your head. This suggests combining chemistry with good sense. While great sex is essential for a sustainable relationship, you need to make your partner options linked here by paying complete attention to your vision, objectives, requirements, and worths -- while feeling all those interesting triggers!

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